Eastern Delight

Was a grand oul time, civilised in nature and respectfully so. Only tinkering on debaucherous, again only a wee bit for I was never really that far inclined, or at least never as much as I would have liked to have been.

But I had had an evening to say the least, came home and chilled on my hotel bed for abit waiting for the room to stop spinning. I got up to go to the bathroom. I dont know whether I got up way too fast or whether the few jars I had had, had stubbornly tried to manifest themselves. But as I stood in the bathroom (as men do like to stand), I kinda just felt my eyes roll up to the celing, closely followed by my head tilting back and shortly thereafter pursued by my whole body rolling backwards, as if I’m slowely being laid onto an imaginary bed, but less cute, more like something you’d see in the exorcist. At the point of physical no return, my eyes closed over and I was asleep for all of 3 seconds. Reason being that there was no feckin floating bed and gravity is a cert.  I don’t remember the falling but I do remember hitting my head on the shower basin, effectively both waking me up and then knocking me out in quick succession. And then just being in and out of it for a few mins looking at the light. It was all abit fuzzy from here on. 

I woke up next morning in bed in the nip, partly because Eastern Europe gets hot in July, partly because drunk Gerard is a hallion. The cleaner lady had knocked at the door, I found some jeans and a tshirt and let her in.  She asked if I had any dirty towels.  I pointed to the en suite and she went and opened the bathroom door.  Christ of almighty, the whole bathroom was covered in towels. Covered…in…towels.  She looked at me and I kinda looked at her. I was just as suprised and slightly concerned as she was. Then it slowely dawned on me. I had raided the linen closet of my hotel room and in my slightly concussed and ego damaged state, I guess I thought it best to cover anything sharp, hard and hazardous after falling over the night previous.  But that was too complex a story to explain to an asian hotel worker who spoke mainly Hungarian. I resorted to simply saying ‘Oh I just, I fell and (pointing to the back of my head) ouch ouch’…she gave me nothing…she left the room and returned with another shampoo/conditioner…

‘More tea and coffee?’

‘Coffee please’

‘More milk?’

‘No, thank you’

(I really wanted the milk)



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